A Bug's Life

"I often wondered what sort of person would adopt a pet based on these local paper ads.", so have I. I'm very fond of the little descriptions they give for the animals.
"Tabby would be suitable for homing with older children"
="Tabby likely to scratch the eyes out of any 4 year old silly enough to try and pet her."
"Tabby needs a home with freedom to roam"
="You will see Tabby twice a week for ten minutes when she brings a dead bird into your house and meoows until you give her food."
I'm glad the hamster has found a loving new home though.