A Bug's Life

fry chopped onions, leeks, maybe celery, in a big pan
add diced swede
add sliced mushrooms. Loads of them. I mean it, they reduce.
you can add a bit of dried soya TVP here if you like.
When they're soggy and fried, splash in a bit of Guinness and add a bay leaf or so.
Let it all reduce a bit further, then top up with more beer. Keep simmering.
Add marmite, not too much, taste as you go. Or stock of your choice, really. Add chopped thyme, black pepper, maybe tomato puree. If it's insufficiently salty, I tend to go for more stock rather than salt, unless the stock is really un-salty.
Mix cornflour with a little liquid (stock or beer) to a smooth paste. thin down, add. Keep simmering, tasting, seasoning until it tastes good.

bugshaw had some dried porcini mushrooms which we washed, broke into bits, rehydrated with boiling water, and added (with the boiling water).

Pie crust: 2 parts flour, 1 part fat, salt, water as needed. Line the pie dish, prick the pastry, weight down, bake blind. Fill, cover, eggwash (or whatever you like), bake.